-----Email Message-----
When I went to my first gynecologist appointment at age 18, it was with a female. Since she was part of a family practice, she had also recently examined my mom, and when she tried to make girl talk, she told me, "Wow! Deep vaginas must run in the family".

Then, she sang "come out, come out wherever you are" to my cervix. I'm 26 now, and I have only been to male gynecologists since then. Whew.


-----Email Message-----
I always figured the male gynecologist paid more attention in school (it's the vagina.. come on..).


8|
I can't even

IMDB keyword meme
1. Go to IMDB.com and look up a bunch of your favorite movies.
2. Post three or four official IMDB "Plot Keywords" for each.
3. Guess the movies! No Googling!
( I had to go dig up my Myspace to remember what movies i like )

I got this from dangerdev !

Step 1: Put your MP3 player or whatever music player you have on random.
Step 2: Post a line/stanza from the first 20 songs that play, no matter how embarrassing the song.
Step 3: Post and let everyone you know guess what song and artist the lines come from.
Step 4: Bold STRIKE the songs when someone guesses correctly.
( why can't my shuffle ever pick cool music )
OKAY WOW THAT WAS EMBARRASSING GO GO GO

( Marie Antoinette on the Way to the Guillotine by Jacques Louis David )
thanks to fashionablycait

NOBODY WILL ANSWER THIS FOR ME AND IT'S REALLY PISSING ME OFF

I have had one job ever: the honorable post of Sales Associate at the Gap outlet. They quit giving me hours after like 4 months and eventually I just stopped going. I KNOW, I know, I'm already on the road to success here. But those days are behind me.

So I am turning in applications to do stupid shit for minimum wage at other places, and there is a box that says LIST YOUR PREVIOUS WORK EXPERIENCE, and then after that a box that says MAY WE CONTACT YOUR PREVIOUS EMPLOYERS?.

What do I do here?? I'm fairly certain my review from my previous employers will not be a shining one. Do I lie by omission and not write that I worked at the Gap? What if they ask "so is this your first job?" Then my lie will be EXPOSED! Do I tell them they're not allowed to call Gap? Doesn't that kind of imply that I was a shitty employee anyway? Do I just list the information and hope they're too lazy to actually make the calls? (this is kind of difficult if I hope to apply at the store next door)

ANY ADVICE ON THIS WOULD BE MUCH APPRECIATED

Hey, I have a sketchblog now! It doesn't have any sketches and idk if I'll even use it, but if you would want to see that kind of thing, you can add it at lameepssketches . No pressure for buttpatts or anything, though (I will probably never check it anyway)

Community College blows chunks, you guys. Everybody around me is having a beautiful eventful social life full of parties and a hundred new friends, and I've had conversations with like.... three people. It's not that I don't interact or be friendly, it's just that everybody already has friends on arrival, and nobody gives a shit about socializing here because it's goddamn community college. I think it would be so nice to learn at a place where people actually WANT to be. I would probably make more friends there, I am guessing.

I shouldn't complain, but I'm complaining. Maybe I only really want things that other people around me have. 8(

What exactly about making other people responsible for your happiness is attractive? What precisely about being needy and creepy and not taking no for an answer is romantic?
I blame Stephanie Meyer.

I can only imagine they did some kind of super-scientific study on the effects of playing with different Lego Duplo® sets on the 3-year-old male and female brains, and it varied so wildly that it became the most important category??

these are the top drawer standards to which you as an artist should aspire

LOOK AT THIS GODDAMN KID
IT MAKES ME WANNA CRY WITH JOY

lol at 60 minutes, though. afaik this documentary seems creepily recent (tl;dw "non gender conforming childrens are probably gay and also you can tell by how swishy they are and whether they like to help their mom in the kitchen")

also I didn't know that about the mermaids! how weirdly fascinating.

I need a new system to organize my addresses and phone numbers. So far my options are:

Paper (not easy to update or find things quickly, easy to lose)
Internet (like in iGoogle app or something? not very durable, can get at it anywhere but not when internet's out)
Lappy (not readily accessible)

Where do YOU put your contacts info? Your two cents, please.

Today I had some scuffles with the college bookstore. On the crappy side, my college is run by CHEAP BASTARDS and full of rich kids whose parents have deep pockets able to withstand ridiculous surprise textbook fees. On the positive side, everybody was all nice and helpful to me. I can only imagine how much less smooth that kind of everyday transaction must be for people who aren't white/middle class/cisgendered/able bodied/whatever. I might not know very much about stuff but I'll tell you, it sure is nice to live in a system that was built for me!
On a more cheerfuler note here is a song I really enjoy. Maybe you will like it too. (iMeem is a cheap bastard, too, so I can't embed it or something easier or i would)

If you love me, send me money.

separate post (because I can!)(I'm sorry, flist)

I SAW DISTRICT 9 AND IT WAS SO GREAT!!!! The alien concepts were so neat and then end almost made me cry in the theatre
MY THEORY IS Christopher was secretly gay with his yellow friend that died Y/Y? You couldnt see right away that he was sad, but he was! Thoughts on this OBVIOUS TRUTH are welcome.

EDIT: AWWWW HE HAS A BLOG! AWWWWWWW according to the videos and comments (sssh I am a tremendous nerd), the aliens have self-sustaining junk but there are still girls and boys. WHICH ONLY FURTHER PROVES MY THEORY I THINK SO YES

My life's dream is to be validated by other people, too! Also, please, folks and FUTURE BOYFRIENDS, don't tell me I'm smart or likeable or fun or a decent person, I mostly just want to hear that I'm beautiful.

Possible trip to commiecomic-con next year with rifurious , fashionablycait , angeleggie , rinkori , stalebiscuits , theillastrator , trentazer_00 , and whoever else that I forgot! I am excited for this.

I'm going to start recording everything I learn in this journal. Today I learned: I can make beignets! They're not even that hard. Then I made deviled eggs, and I learned that you can use a Ziploc bag with a hole on it in lieu of a pastry bag to do the little fillings, if you want to get all fancy about it. I am the classiest chef on the block.

Things that have to be done by the end of summer:
job get
license get
figure out why the fuck I owe an extra $100 to BC in fees
pay fees
finish trades/apps/comics I have been putting off all summer
make some illustrations and put them in a portfolio space
ask the internet for money for art

BELIEVE IN ME, GUYS!

I think I've done it before, but it must have been more than a year ago and I am too lazy to check.

( I tag Suddenly )

oops that was hella boring. Maybe your answers will be better

"How to Make Yourself Irresistible to Guys" (stolen from symmie ) changed my life! I am now rolling in sweet man-love thanks to these simple tips:

"Forget what your mom told you about being yourself." Men will only love you for who you are if you be someone else!

Step 1: "Don't starve yourself!"-- Not out of any desire for personal well-being and self confidence, but because men prefer the curves.

Step 2: "If your hair is short, grow it out! Studies show that men love long, full, wavy manes." Remember, respectable ladies don't go about with short hair and short skirts listening to JAZZ MUSIC!

Step 3: "Have a makeover expert show you how to make your eyes appear larger. Large peepers are universally appealing!" Also blue eyes! And white skin! And blonde hair! Heil Hitler!

Step 4: "People who are picky are actually more desirable to the opposite sex..." Take as many opportunities as you can find to let him know HE IS BARELY GOOD ENOUGH!

Step 5: "Be informed and well read... In fact, men aren't as shallow as we think! For the long haul, they want a woman they can talk to." As shocking that it is that some men have mastered conversational English, never forget to enrich yourself solely to attract mates!

Step 6: "Use targeted flattery. Figure out how he likes to think of himself. Does he fancy himself a ___? Then reinforce that perception!" Never be honest; only insincere flattery and manipulation will yeild true love!

Step 7: "Laugh at his jokes! While women want a men who can make them laugh, men want a women who will appreciate their wit." Women, naturally, do not tell jokes because they are usually too busy crying or squeezing out children.

Step 8: "Enjoy being the belle of the ball." When men love you for who they think you ought to be, your life will be complete! Lather, rinse, and repeat.